A flash from the past ......of sorts......

My son is a Freshman in High School. Yes, I said it I have a high-schooler. I guess it's taken about half the school year for me to actually admit it.

He is adjusting well, making new friends and has recovered from his first "C" ever. He also is Wrestling for the first time. He has played organized sports since he was five and is no stranger to being on a team. Wrestling is a bit different. It's as much individual as a team sport. It's kind of like being up to Bat with a full count for the entire match. It's intense.

He wrestled at another school last week and even though he lost the "team" won. Which is a good thing. The team is a very close knit group that practice six days a week and all support one another. It was a relief to see how his teammates have accepted him and support their teammates. They refer to each other as "family".

This is also the first time I have not been permitted to watch practice . I am a bit overprotective and controlling .....I admit it.....but I like to sit quietly and scrutinize the coaches. To see how they treat the kids, their fellow coaches and to get my "feeling" for the people in charge of my kid. It's been hard for me to loose that control. But I'm dealing with it.

I was sitting in the empty High School parking lot at 9:37pm waiting for his bus to arrive, I couldn't help but feel like my Dad must have, waiting for me to arrive from some class trip or softball game.
I sat there with my parking lights on just as my Dad did every time he picked me up. It was 9:45 by the time he got back. It was late for a school night especially since his school day started before 7am. He was so tired and hungry, he had a headache.... he was pale. Oh...how.. I remember that feeling.

What did I do? I sent him there, I felt like it was all my fault. All I could do is feed him, give him an ibuprofen and wish he didn't have any homework.

I couldn't help but flash back to the way my Mom tried to repair the day's damage, with all the tools in her kit. Soup, Hot Tea maybe even a grilled cheese......or... anything I asked for. When I came home feeling like a cold wet rag with a pounding head.

I felt a helpless feeling for sending my boy out there and hoping you can fix what's hurt when he comes back. It's a whole new experience for me. The story is familiarr but the characters are changed. A whole new perspective.

Dad,
Thanks for always being there with the parking lights on, guiding me to the landing.

Mom,
Thanks for always being there ready to administer the aid necessary to bring me back to life.